by David Hayman (7th)

When the school announced that all buses would be replaced with F/A 18 Hornets, it wasn't a surprise because the new administration had said that it was looking for “Faster modes of transport.”

While any logical person would not expect that they meant a 1,135 MPH change in max speed ( the max speed of a school bus is 55 MPH, and an F/A 18 hornet has a max speed of 1,190 MPH, there is no logical person in this district, so everyone expected it. Also, with the way things have been going, this makes total sense.

The way these military grade fighter jets were aquired by a simple public school was out of luck. One of the vice principals got a coupon in the mail addressed “Voldymr Zelensky- Kyiv, Ukraine."

He opened it anyway , committing a small federal crime of opening mail not addressed to you. The coupon was 50 percent off any McDonnell Douglas product. Combining this with a by one get 3 free sale at NATO, they got 4 f/18 for the price of 14,500,00 dollars.

Where did they get this money? Grant funding, for investing in resources for students.
“Your tax dollars in action!” said the principal of CMS.

Students interested in riding the F/A 18 hornets in both the morning and afternoon, must first find their assigned airfield, using the district website. On the same page, there is a form to apply. Once a student applies, they must go through High- G training, as they might experience this.

After these steps are completed, you are eligible to take the school fighter jets in the
morning and afternoon.

Image Citation:

Boeing. “F/A 18 Super Hornet.” Popular Mechanics, Hearst Media Inc., https://hips.hearstapps.com/hmg-prod/images/superhornetcfts-1518811253.png. Accessed 2 Feb. 2023.